Researching our family history can be a life-changing, affirming experience and has the potential to improve our mental health, but it can also come with potential psychological risks. I am grateful to Emeritus psychology professor Susan M Moore research and her excellent articles Family History Research and Distressing Emotions and Ethical Dilemmas and Family History: A Psychological Approach.
First, let us remind ourselves that this absorbing hobby is not compulsory and we can choose what we research and how. As always, we need to look after ourselves.
Here are some of the key risks Susan raises:
1. Emotional Distress
- Unexpected Discoveries: Finding out about ancestors who faced tragic events, behaved badly, or were treated unfairly can trigger strong emotions such as anger, sadness, or shock.
- Feelings of Betrayal: Discovering family secrets or hidden truths can lead to feelings of betrayal and distrust, especially if these revelations challenge long-held beliefs about one’s family.
2. Ethical Dilemmas
- Moral Conflicts: Uncovering actions or decisions made by ancestors that conflict with modern values can pose moral dilemmas, leading to internal conflict and distress. What should we do if we find out that there are people in our tree to whom we are not biologically related? Is this information we should share, and if so, how widely?
- Privacy Concerns: Researching living relatives or sensitive family matters can raise ethical questions about privacy and consent. When we consider publishing any findings, we need to know what is and is not legal in our country.
3. Identity Crisis
- Cultural Displacement: For those of us with mixed heritage or those who discover unexpected ethnic backgrounds, there can be a sense of cultural displacement or confusion about our identity.3
- Reevaluation of Self: Major revelations about our family history can lead to a reevaluation of one’s identity, which can be unsettling and disorienting.3
4. Psychological Impact of Trauma
- Transgenerational Trauma: Learning about traumatic events experienced by ancestors can evoke feelings of grief and sadness, and sometimes, may even trigger symptoms of transgenerational trauma.
- Mental Health Struggles: Discovering a history of addiction or mental health issues in the family can be distressing and may lead to anxiety about one’s own mental health, or that of other family members.
5. Relationship Strain
- Family Conflicts: Sharing and publishing our discoveries with family members can lead to conflict, especially if we had different relationships or experienced our loved ones in another way to other members of the family.
- Isolation: The emotional burden of certain discoveries may lead us to withdraw from family interactions to give us time to process our feelings.
Mitigation
By approaching family history research with sensitivity, preparedness, and ethical considerations, we can mitigate potential risks and enjoy the many benefits of understanding our ancestry. This thoughtful approach can help us build a richer, more connected sense of self while respecting the complexities of our family’s past.
Here are some strategies to help family historians navigate this process:
1. Emotional Preparedness
- Set Expectations: We need to understand that we may uncover unexpected or distressing information. We should prepare ourself emotionally for the possibility of discovering tough truths about our ancestors.
- Seek Support: If we encounter distressing information, I recommend we talk to a support group for genealogists, other family historians, or a mental health professional. Sharing our experiences with others can comfort us and give us a new perspective.
2. Ethical Considerations
- Respect Privacy: We can be mindful of the privacy of living relatives and we should get informed consent before sharing sensitive information about them.
- Handle Sensitive Information Carefully: When dealing with potentially harmful or controversial information, we should consider the impact on all family members before disclosing it. Once we have told one person, we cannot control what happens to the information.
3. Managing Identity and Cultural Sensitivity
- Cultural Sensitivity: We can approach our research with sensitivity, especially if we discover new or unexpected aspects of our heritage. We can research and respect the traditions and values of any culture we uncover.
- Identity Integration: If we discover new cultural or ethnic backgrounds, we need to take the time to integrate this information into our sense of self. We can seek resources and communities that can help us understand and embrace our heritage.
4. Addressing Transgenerational Trauma
- Professional Guidance: If we uncover a history of trauma or mental health issues in our family tree, we can consider seeing a therapist who specialises in transgenerational trauma. They can help you process and address these issues constructively. This can be of enormous help to future generations.
- Healing Practices: We can engage in healing practices such as journaling, meditation, or family discussions, to process and release any emotional burdens we may have.
5. Strengthening Family Relationships
- Open Communication: If possible, we can foster open and respectful communication with family members about our findings. We can encourage discussions that allow for different perspectives and feelings.
- Conflict Resolution: We may be able to use our research to understand and resolve family conflicts. Understanding the historical context of family dynamics can provide insights that help in resolving ongoing disputes. We can talk to a relationship therapist to help us do this.
6. Ethical Sharing and Documentation
- Document Responsibly: When documenting our findings, we should be accurate and respectful and avoid sensationalising or misrepresenting any information. We need to consider what will happen to our notes and records when we die.
- Share Thoughtfully: We can share our findings in a way that is considerate of each of our family members’ feelings and privacy. We need to use discretion when deciding what to share publicly and consider discussing these issues with a mental health professional who understands family dynamics, preferably one who is interested in genealogy.
Conclusion
By approaching family history research with sensitivity, preparedness, and ethical considerations, we can mitigate potential risks and enjoy the many benefits of understanding our ancestry.
If we encounter distressing information or have a dilemma, I suggest we seek support from one another, support groups or an experienced mental health professional.
A thoughtful approach can help us build a richer, more connected sense of self while respecting the complexities of our family’s past.
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